Of Fire and Shadows
by redmoon333
Summary: A tale of a young girl growing up during the First Wizarding War and the friends she meets, the hardships she faces, and a love that steadily blooms in her heart. Both love and war spare not a single soul.
1. Of Appearances and Eleventh Birthdays

Of Fire and Shadow

Alright. So I've decided to re-do Chapter One. Tell me what you think, please.

Chapter One: Of Appearances and Eleventh Birthdays

It was a warm, sunny summer day. Of course, you couldn't tell with all the smog covering the sky. The date was July 27, 1971: my eleventh birthday. I was spending my time getting dressed and brushing my hair; it isn't every day that a girl turns eleven. I looked at my reflection in the mirror. My deep red hair was perfectly straight. I had always wished it would curl or even wave, but no. Always as straight as a board. My skin was pale and, to my deep gratitude, freckle-less. My eyes, I thought, were a rather peculiar shade of blue. They were a brilliant shade of blue. It was both bright and dark at the same time. Neither of my parents had this eye color, nor anyone else I've ever met. I both love and hate them. They were such a pretty color, but they were strange and I was teased by the other neighborhood children because of them.

Even now, I can remember their taunts. Creep. Weirdo. Freak. The list goes on. It didn't help that I was magical, either. Any friends that I _did_ manage to make would find out what I was, eventually. I can still remember the look on this one girl's face when I showed her how I can make a rock float in midair. Her eyes widened in fear. She turned and ran. And I can still hear the name she called me echoing in my head. The one name that haunts me the most.

Monster.

But, enough about that. It was, after all, my birthday. Dwelling on such things is too depressing for such a special day. I could already hear my parents going about downstairs getting ready for my "birthday breakfast". Now, I would bet ten galleons that you're thinking "What is so special about someone turning 11?" Well, I'll tell you what's special. About a month ago, I received a letter of invitation to go to Hogwarts. Once my mother had seen the envelope, she gathered us all into our small living room to read the letter. My father, the wizard of the family, was brimming with pride. My mother, a muggle, was ecstatic for me. That's why the eleventh birthday is so special; it means in a few months, I'll be on the Hogwarts Express heading to spend my very first year at Hogwarts: School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

I went downstairs and was instantly greeted with a chorus (even though there are only two people saying it) of "Happy Birthday"s and given my favorite breakfast: apple chutney, Earl Grey tea (black; I hate sweet things) and a slice of toast. Not a very large meal, but it was my favorite. After breakfast, I decided to spend the day outside while my parents went about their errands. I lived in the little town of Cokeworth. My house was pretty close to Spinner's End, which is where I often went to go play, despite my parents' protests. It was an incredibly run-down place; which made it all the more fun to explore. Especially the abandoned factory. That was the only place I could toy with my "abilities" without muggle interference.

There is also another reason I go to Spinner's End; a boy. I still remember the first time I saw him. Greasy black hair, an incredibly large nose, and his skin was so incredibly sallow. His clothes were mismatched and far too large for him; hand-me-downs, most likely. That wasn't what made me so curious about him, though. It was his eyes. They were black, blacker than night. In them, I saw a misery that was all too familiar to me; a loneliness that I knew very well. Sure, I had my parents, but other children (no, other _people_, not just children) avoided me like the plague. They somehow _knew_ that I was "unusual". Maybe it was my eyes, or maybe the fact that strange things happened around me (I am a _witch_, after all). I had no friends. No acquaintances. It was just me and my parents; and even _they_, my _parents_, weren't there all the time. This boy had the same eyes as me. They were filled with that emptiness that I often saw in my own reflection. So, naturally, I became curious.

After that first day, we were always bumping into each other. I would be playing around an abandoned building somewhere, when lo and behold; he would be in the same place. I never approached him, even though I was curious. He wouldn't play, either. He would only walk around, looking at random things. He would also, to my shock, play with magic. Another way he was like me. I wondered if he would want to be my friend, since we were both so alike.

One day, though, I was playing (after I ran into him again, of course), and he turns around and gives me a horrible glare.

"_You_." He growls, "Quit following me." And then he stormed off somewhere else, leaving me confused. The confusion didn't last for long, though. It gave way to indignation.

"I wasn't following you!" I shouted at where he had once been, "I was just playing around!" I gave a huff and continued what I had been doing before. Now, I most certainly did _not_ want to be his friend.

Even after that incident, we still kept running into each other. It was rather…annoying.

_Speaking of which_, there the little prat stood (well, actually he was crouching behind a bush, but you get the point). It was then I got a nasty idea. Ever so quietly, I tip-toed up behind and got _real_ close behind him and whispered:

"What are you doing?" I asked. He screamed, which I found really, _really_ funny. He, however, did not.

"Wh-what are _you_ doing?" the boy hissed out. He was clearly flustered, which only added to my amusement. I decided to tease him a little.

"How rude. I asked you first."

"WHAT? _You're_ the rude one! Why are you so close to me anyway?"

"Well, I was receiving the impression that you didn't want to be spotted by whomever or whatever it is you are very obviously hiding from, so I thought I would scrunch down so no one would see me. Which brings me to my next question, who or what are you watching like a love-struck puppy?"

"I-I am NOT watching anyone! I-I-I just happened to…notice…them." He mumbled out.

"Ah, so you "noticed" someone and decided to look at them with the intensity of the sun whilst hiding behind a bush. That is definitely not watching. _No_, in fact, to me it sounds like stalking." He made quite an indignant expression at this.

"Stalking? _Stalking_! _You_ want to talk to _me_ about STALKING! You've been stalking me for _five weeks_ and you want to talk to me about _STALKING!_"

"Why, yes. It's not a very healthy habit to get into. And I don't stalk you. It's simply coincidence that we keep running into each other. You're just too thick-headed to see it for what it really is." Ah, what a nasty scowl that earned

"Go away. Or…or I'll make something _bad_ happen to you." He growled.

"Oh. So you're going to use magic on me, then. Alright! Give it your best shot!" I crossed my arms, trying my best to appear like someone who is capable of great patience.

"Wait a minute. How do you know about magic?"

"Because _I'm_ magic, you silly boy. How else do you think I would know about it?" His expression seemed a bit put off, but I didn't miss the curiosity light up in his eyes.

"Prove it."I glared at him. What a distrustful little snot. So, to prove that I was _indeed _magic, I put all my focus onto a leaf on the ground, and levitated it. He seemed genuinely shocked; insultingly so.

"You really _are_ magic."

"Alright, I'm tired of showing off. I want to know who you "noticed"." I pushed past him and peered over the bushes. Two girls were playing on a swing. One had a foul and downright snotty disposition. She had blonde hair and wasn't all that pretty. The other was a fellow red-head and seemed to be warm like a nice, summer day. She, of course, was very pretty.

"It's the red-head isn't' it?"

"H-how'd you know?"

"She's prettier than the other one."

"O-oh." There was an awkward silence after that. We both continued to watch the girls swing. After a few seconds, he began to talk again, "She's like us, you know."

"'Like us'?"

"Magic." I nodded my head in understanding. We both watched as the girl began to swing higher and higher until, once she was high enough, she jumped off the swing and landed on the ground. Her sister, with her incredibly unpleasant voice began to nag the girl about what "their mother" said to which the other girl, "Lily" from what the obnoxious one said, told the girl that she was okay. As a means of distraction, from what I assume, she told, from what I guess, her sister to watch her do something. She began to approach the bush. The boy and I duck down and hold our breaths. We hear Lily's footsteps getting closer and closer until they stop. Then we heard a quick tug at the bush and footsteps walk away again. Deeming it safe, we popped our heads up to see again. Lily then began to manipulate the petals of a flower from the bush using magic.

From her sister's squeals, she disapproved of it.

"It's not right!" she exclaimed, then with a hint of curiosity, "H-how do you do it?" The boy, unable to contain himself anymore revealed himself; I follow suit.

"It's obvious, isn't it?" The obnoxious girl screamed and hid behind the swings; Lily stayed put.

"What's obvious?" clearly confused and alarmed.

"I know what you are." The boy seemed to have a nervous glee about him.

"What do you mean?" The girl seems even more alarmed now.

"You're…"this boy obviously had a flair for drama with the way he was inserting dramatic pauses in his speech, "You're a witch." It took everything to keep myself from laughing. The girl's expression practically screamed outrage. It was rather amusing to see her face contort so viciously.

"_That's_ not a very nice thing to say to somebody!" I couldn't help myself then. I began to cackle madly at her retort. The boy turned and gave me a vicious glare and the girl (ha! This is rich!)! The girl _literally_ turned her nose up in the air and walked off. The boy tried to run after them; a vain attempt to get them to stay. He tried so hard to get them to see what he meant, even going so far as to tell them of his own wizardry. The sister laughed in his face.

"Wizard!" her voice was full of malicious intent, "_I_ know who _you _are! You're that Snape boy! They live down at Spinner's End by the river!" The imperiousness in her voice and her overall "better-than-you" attitude made me want to vomit. I stopped laughing. "And that girl he's with! She's that girl with the _freaky eyes_! The one in our neighborhood!" In an instant, I found myself _hating_ this girl. "Why have you been spying on us anyway?" She sneered. I chose this moment to approach them. Even if he _was_ a rude dunderhead, he _still_ needed _someone_ to stick up for him.

"I haven't been spying." His was tone the same as when I accused him, "Besides, who would want to spy on_ you_ anyway? _You're_ a muggle." It was evident that she did not know what "muggle" meant, but she got the gist of what he was saying. I remained silent.

"Come on, Lily! We're leaving!" She stomped off, with Lily close behind her; only pausing to give a small glare at "Snape". We stood there, silent for a moment. That is, until I could no longer stand it.

"Well…That went well." Snape, not appreciating my attempt at lightening the mood, shot me a look.

"Oh, shut up and go home!" He began to stalk off. I brushed off his comment and followed him.

"Why do you dislike me so much?" He turned swiftly back towards me.

"Maybe it's because you keep following me when I keep telling you to go away!" He snarled.

"I already told you! I wasn't following you! I just kept bumping into you!"

"Yeah right! Like I'm going to believe _that_!"

"It's _true_! Honest! What reason would I have to lie about this?" He made to argue, and then paused to consider my words. Then, he sighed; his eyebrows were knitted together like he was frustrated.

"Fine. I believe you. But, what is it that you _want_ from me?" That made me freeze. What _did_ I want from him? I thought and thought (not an easy task when someone is staring holes into your face), until I simply came to the conclusion that, even though he had always been so rude to me, I still wanted to be his friend. And that's what I told him. The look on his face when I said that was priceless. He seemed incredulous at the mere thought of me wanting to be his friend. I felt insulted, really.

"Is the prospect of being my friend so ridiculous?" I questioned, a little bit miffed. He remained quiet for a few minutes, before he busted out laughing. Way to make me feel better about myself.

"No! No, no, no! That's not it at _all_!" he got out in between guffaws. He allowed himself a few more laughs before sobering up, "I was just surprised is all! Not a lot of people really want to be my friend. In fact, _no one_ wants to be my friend. They find me…"His face saddened, that same look I saw in his eyes the first day I met him were present now, "…_repulsive_." He murmured the last part, his eyes downcast. He looked back up at me after a few seconds and asked, "Why…do you want to be my friend?" I just smiled and answered truthfully.

"Because," all the painful memories of being alone surfaced up, "people consider me "repulsive", too." I smiled weakly and look up at him. I'm surprised at the astonished look on his face.

"_Why_?" he asked, "There's _nothing_ wrong with you? Me, I can understand. But, _you_? You're _normal_!"

"Even my eyes?" He paused, looking at my eyes. He made a face, as if contemplating for a moment, before speaking.

"Well, it's true that I've never seen anyone with eyes like yours, but they're not weird! They're just really, _really_ blue!" then, he just sighed. "I don't understand people." I chuckled.

"Me either." We just stand there for a while, each of us thinking about our own unfortunate circumstances. Then, I came up with an idea.

"_Alright_!" I exclaimed, "Let's be friends! And we'll help each other forget about all the hateful and stupid people in the world! We'll take each other to the top and show these people what-for!" I held out my hand for him to shake. "Let's start off with introducing ourselves! I'm Silva Sterling, nice to meet you." He looked at me as if I was deranged, but then reached out and grabbed my hand.

"Severus Snape." We shook our hands.

* * *

I suppose, looking back on it now, this was how everything started for me. If I had never met Snape, I would probably have never done the things I did, met the people I would meet, or have half the experiences that I've went through.

My life would have been decidedly boring.


	2. Of Train Rides and Professors

I do not own Harry Potter of any of the characters in it. Also, I give credit for the dialog between Snape, Potter, and Black, then Hagrid and McGonagall, and then McGonagall's welcoming speech to JKR. I simply used it becuase I think McGonagall says it out of routine. Enjoy!

Chapter 2: Of Train Rides and Professors

Today was the day. The day that the students of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry were to go to King's Cross station, enter Platform 9 ¾ and go onto the Hogwarts Express. From there, the students would ride for hours until they reached Hogwarts. Today was that day for me.

I was waiting at King's Cross Station in front of Hogwarts Express for Severus. My parents were kind enough to let Lily and her parents come with us since they did not know anything about the wizarding world. So, there we were; my family and her family, waiting for our third friend to show up. Now, although I am very intelligent for my age (I will not even _bother_ to deny it), I didn't exactly have a lot of patience. To be frank, I had about as much patience as Snape had grace and charm. None. No offense towards one of my closest friends, but he's as charming as the Tasmanian Devil and as graceful as an elephant. So, in short, I was severely irritated.

I began to pace. Back and forth, back and forth I would walk. Finally, after much pacing, I gave an exasperated sigh.

"Where _is_ he?" I groaned. I wanted to hurry up and get on the train and get to Hogwarts as fast as I could; Mum was starting to get…weepy. I chance a glance in my mother's direction. She seemed like she finally calmed down no—nope. The moment her eyes locked with mine, she began blubbering again. And once again, for the 50th time this morning, I got captured in her death-grip of a hug. I tried to let her know of my inability to breathe, but she was undeterred and continued squeezing the life out of me until I began to turn blue. My father decided to intervene…_again_.

"Come now, Joan. She's not leaving forever. Of course, if you keep squeezing her to death like that, she might be too frightened to come back."

"But, Abelard, dear. She's- she's…" Oh, no. Here come the waterworks. Tears began falling from the corners of her eyes and her bottom lip began to tremble. "She's our _baby_!" she wailed. I felt my face heat up like a furnace.

"_Mum_!" I hissed, "You're causing a _scene_!" She sniffled, attempting to calm down for my sake.

"I-I'm sorry, dear. I-It's just that you're about to take such a big step. And you are going to be so _very_ far away from home. It's really too much for a mother to _bear_!" and like that, I was instantly enveloped in her death-hug once more. I, resigned to my fate (and feeling a little bit guilty due to my mum's words), simply sighed grumpily.

We stayed like that for a while, when I caught sight of a familiar and long awaited face. It seemed that Lily also caught sight of our friend, for we both shouted for him at the same time:

"**SEVERUS**!" we cried out happily. We both ran towards him, but slowed down seeing who was with him. It was a woman; I assume it was his mother. She was tall, thin, and had a sour expression on her face. Of course, if I had to deal with an abusive drunkard for a husband every day, I'm pretty sure I would be wearing the same expression.

Severus turned towards his mother and gave a brief goodbye. He hesitated before walking towards us, though; it was almost like he was waiting, hoping for something. When whatever it is he wanted did not happen, he simply continued on his way towards us. I caught _that_ look in his eyes and instantly felt sympathy for him. I may have been lonely, but at least I still had my parents. Severus? He didn't have _anyone_.

Of course, I was determined to change that fact. _I_ would be there for him. And from the looks of it, Lily, too. My goal was to get rid of that loneliness in his heart, even if it takes most of my life. I wouldn't stop until I saw him smile in a truly happy way.

"Alright! We've been waiting for you for _hours_! Let's _go_ already!" I grabbed both his and Lily's hands and proceeded to drag them to the train. I heard my mother start crying again behind me and began to hurry towards the train. We hurried to an almost empty compartment; there were only two boys already seated there, so it was mostly empty. It didn't matter, as long as I got as far away from the Great-Hug-of-Death, I was fine. I _still_ felt bad about it, though; she _is_ my mum. But, you have no idea what having the life squeezed out of you by a weeping woman feels like.

Once we were seated, I opened the window and began to wave to my parents, with Lily joining me. I felt safer to show my affections where I can't be grabbed at or hugged. Even as the train started moving, Lily and I continued to wave madly until they were out of sight. Afterwards, Lily and I both sat down and began to talk animatedly with Severus about what Hogwarts would be like. The two boys we shared a compartment with seemed too engrossed in their own conversation to pay attention; so we felt safe saying anything, really. We were in the middle of talking about houses, with Severus stating that Lily and I had better get sorted into Slytherin House, when we were…_interrupted_.

"_Slytherin_?" a voice asked. We all three look up to see one of the boys, a boy with messy black-brown hair, looking at us with an expression of shock mixed with disgust and a hint of genuine confusion. Once he knew he had our attention, he continued to put his two-cents in.

"Who wants to be in Slytherin?" he then turned to the boy sitting across from him, "I think I'd leave, wouldn't you?" The other boy, a handsome boy with long, black hair and pretty blue eyes frowned deeply.

"My whole family's been in Slytherin." He deadpanned. This seemed to shock the Slytherin-hater greatly.

"Blimey!" He exclaimed, "and I thought you seemed alright!" Blue-eyes grinned at that.

"Maybe I'll break the tradition." He replied nonchalantly, and then asked "Where are you heading, if you've got the choice?" The other boy didn't even have to think before responding. He puffed out his chest and put his balled-up fist over his heart and proudly proclaimed for the entire world to hear:

"Gryffindor! Where dwell the brave of heart!" I tried to quell my snickering at his overall dramatic-ness about it. Lily seemed to find his antics amusing, as well. Severus, on the other hand, did not and grunted in disapproval. Slytherin-hater was quick to respond.

"You got a problem with that?" Snape sneered slightly before saying:

"No. If you'd rather be brawny than brai-," Blue-eyes decided to make a quip at Severus' almost insult.

"Where're you hoping to go, seeing as how you're neither?" He shot, with an arrogant smirk gracing his features. Severus' face became a deep red at that, and was about to retort when an equally as-red-in-the-face Lily decided to intervene.

"Come on, Severus, Silva. Let's go find another compartment." She grabbed Severus' hand and briskly walked out of the compartment with Severus in tow. I lazily got up and began to follow after them. Why must all boys be dunderheads?

"See ya, Snivellus!" One of the boys called to Severus as we all left. That made me stop in my tracks.

Annoyed at the boys' behavior, I decided to bruise their ego a bit.

"Oh yes, you two are _definitely_ getting into Gryffindor with the way you call people names when they aren't around to defend themselves. _Very brave_, indeed." And with that, I closed the compartment doors behind me, and followed after Lily and Severus.

Unfortunately, a lot of the other compartments were mostly filled. So, I had to sit in a compartment further in the back, and Severus and Lily got to sit with each other. Oh well. At least I got to sit with a quiet group. Poor Severus had to deal with girly chit-chat. You know, the ones filled with squeals and giggles? Yeah, _that_ kind of conversation.

Well, for the entire train ride, I was in "La La Land". Since I was in the quiet compartment, there was no conversation whatsoever. So, I daydreamed to ease my ever-increasing boredom. For hours, I just thought and thought, even when we changed into our uniforms, I continued to think about things. And then, when I was beginning to get tired of thinking, the train finally stopped. All of the students hurried out of the train, too excited to control themselves. Once out of the train, I quickly went about finding Lily and Severus. Thankfully, it didn't take too long.

Just as I was about to comment on Severus' _enjoyable_ train ride, a giant man with crazy hair and a beard called all of the first years over to him. If it wasn't for the fact that I thought he would kill me if I refused, I would have ran away. I looked over to Lily and Severus; they looked about as frightened as I was.

All of the students followed the giant man, whom we found less scary after he decided to make conversation to calm us all down, until we arrived at a massive lake. There were several boats waiting there for us, but that's not what had the students' attention. Off in the distance stood Hogwarts. It truly was a sight to behold. It was a massive castle that seemed to touch the sky, a bastion of magic, and, most importantly, our new home for months to come.

All of the first years climbed into the boats at the giant man's command. I found relief in the fact that the boat ride didn't take _too_ long. When we were on shore once more, we continued walking until we reached the castle double-doors. From there, the giant man led us through the castle until we reached a set of stairs where someone else waited for us. This woman was nowhere near as tall as the giant man. She was, though, a little more frightening. She wore traditional dress robes and had her hair pulled into a tight bun, giving her a strict look. Her rectangular glasses that were perched on her nose added to the severity of her appearance. It also didn't help that her expression was incredibly stern. Yes, this woman was definitely someone who would not tolerate any nonsense.

"Here're the firs' years, Professor McGonagall." The woman named McGonagall gave a nod "Thank you, Hagrid; I can take them from here." The giant man, now known as Hagrid, left with a quick goodbye, leaving us with the newly met Professor McGonagall.

"Welcome to Hogwarts," she began, "The start-of-term banquet will begin shortly, but before you take your seats in the Great Hall, you will be sorted into your houses. The Sorting is a very important ceremony because, while you are here, your house will be something like your family within Hogwarts. You will have classes with the rest of your house, sleep in your house dormitory and spend free time in your house common room." She paused and made sure all of us were paying attention.

"The four houses are called Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw and Slytherin. Each house has its own noble history and each has produced outstanding witches and wizards. While you are at Hogwarts, your triumphs will earn your house points, while any rule-breaking will lose house points. At the end of the year, the house with the most points is awarded the House Cup, a great honor. I hope each of you will be a credit to whichever house becomes yours. The Sorting Ceremony will take place in a few minutes in front of the rest of the school. I suggest you all smarted yourselves up as much as you can while you are waiting." Her gaze lingered on a few students; each of them, after noticing, began to clean themselves up a bit.

"I will return when we are ready for you," she made for the double doors. "Please wait quietly." And wait quietly we did. No one in that room wanted to cross the stern looking professor. Despite the fact that I was incredibly intimidated, I was still annoyed at the fact that I had to wait some more.

"Wait, wait, and wait some more. That's all we've done today. I'm tired of waiting." I whispered.

"Don't be so impatient." Severus hissed, "We're almost through waiting, so complaining is pointless." I only grumbled in response; he had a point. It wasn't long before Professor McGonagall came back and began to escort us into the Great Hall. I was filled to the brim with excitement! I couldn't wait to get sorted and begin the school year! But, most of all, I couldn't wait to finally get some food in my belly! I was _starving_!

I wasn't even five steps in the Great Hall before the sight of it stole my breath away. It was simply _amazing_.

* * *

This day, I feel, was the most important day of my life. It was on this day that I would meet some of my closest friends, my mentor, and some of my most hated enemies. It was the first step for all of us, really.

None of us knew the terrible things that would happen to each of us in the future.


End file.
